Landing at Basrah International airport was about as glamorous as my first landing here, the now-familiar pungent pong of poo rolled down the airplane to greet us all back. The temperature was a pretty cool 32 degrees when we got off the plane, but then it was three in the morning still, the sweat instantly started to roll unpleasantly down my back. I wasn’t quite expecting the heat to be as exhausting as it was on the first day, a steady 56 degrees showed on the thermometer that we now have to keep in the shade to stop the plastic melting!

So little seems to have changed, the streets still smell, Army food is still terrible, and groundhog day has already well and truly set in. The only change really being the baddies seem to have come up with new terrifying ways of attacking us, which they have already used to some pretty unpleasant degree of success. The one great change during my absence is that someone has installed a Portakabin full of porcelain loos!! Finally, the hideous portaloo experiences of the last three and a half months can be avoided and some proper relaxing moments can be enjoyed.

My desire to waterski down the Shat Al Arab river has increased tenfold, my only hurdle currently being acquiring a waterski I left mine at home during a rushed departure, and my barefoot waterskiing is simply not up to scratch! I have launched myself into the beach volleyball circuit with all the gusto of Maverick and Goose, I am trying to get a sound system wired up so we can have “Playing with the Boys” blasting out while we play, I am convinced this will bring a new level of skill to my game.